Are you facing indecision when it comes to a business idea? Maybe you are undecided about a certain relationship or life direction or perhaps you just struggle with everyday decisions that you don’t have time for anymore.

This article outlines the reasons why indecision is not good for your mind and why indecision is our biggest time waster, as well as how indecision directly affects your mental health. Keep in mind that when we increase our ability to overcome indecision, we also increase our confidence and overall mind management and health, so I will include some ways to organize the messy mind and tie up loose ends and some thought processes and even some wisdom and insight to help. I call this ‘clearing the clutter.’

Indecision is a state of confusion, of being unable to make a choice or having difficulty making a decision. There are many possible reasons for indecision, such as fear of making the wrong decision, uncertainty, low self-esteem, perfectionism, confusion, people pleasing, or lack of confidence and trust in oneself. Another reason in the big picture of things is a lack of direction and identity; the not knowing who you are, what you want or where you’re going. Indecision can have negative consequences for your mental health, your self-esteem, and your confidence. It can also cause you to miss out on opportunities and experiences that would otherwise enrich your life.

“Indecision is the thief of opportunity.”

However, indecision can be overcome by applying some strategies such as:

• Planning
• Mind management
• Monitoring your self-talk
• Limiting your options
• Looking at the pros and cons
• Setting aside time to journal and sort your thoughts
• Seeking advise
• Keep moving forward (Goals required)

“It is your decisions, and not your conditions, that determine your destiny.” ― Tony Robbins

How does indecision effect our mental health?

Learning to trust in yourself along with confidence and maturity are required to make decisions that allow you to move forward, by compartmentalizing any fragments of the imagination and sort out what is important to you by taking a look at your values and beliefs and managing your mind to the best of your ability. This also requires planning and discipline.

“Overthinking: the art of creating new problems out of ones that never existed in the first place.” – Anon

When we spend too much time thinking over every option, we miss out on opportunities and experiences that could enrich our lives. We may also waste our energy and resources on things that are not important or meaningful to us. Indecision can keep us stuck in a state of inertia, where nothing changes, and nothing improves.

“Not making a decision is actually a decision. It’s the decision to stay the same.” – Lisa Terkeurst

Research shows that we make 35,000 decisions on any given day. That’s a lot of both conscious and unconscious decisions! When one decision can change the course of a life it’s little wonder we try and avoid them!

What does people pleasing have to do with indecision?

Pleasing others can influence your decisions that make others happy, and to keep the peace, while you are left with the collateral damage, picking up the pieces and feeling unfulfilled. Some people hesitate to make decisions because they want to please others or avoid conflict. They may be influenced by the opinions, expectations, or demands of others, or have inability to assert their own views and opinions.  People pleasing and indecision are often related, because people who want to please others may find it hard to make choices that reflect their own needs and preferences. Some of the reasons why people pleasing can lead to indecision are:

• Fear of making a mistake
• Fear of conflict
• Too many options
• Lack of self-awareness until after the fact
• Social pressure.
• Desire to be liked
• Wanting to fit in or belong
• Not aware of one’s own values
• Lacking confidence to speak up
• Have no real dreams, desire or direction

“Failure is a detour, not a dead-end street.” – Zig Ziglar

What happens to our brain when we are indecisive?

Indecision can lead to reduced motivation and impaired decision-making ability. One study has linked grey matter loss in the medial and ventral prefrontal cortex areas of the brain to reduced motivation and impaired decision-making ability. I’ve heard it called ‘numbness of the mind.’ This grey matter loss is seen in people with depression. Depression can further lower your motivation and your confidence in your decisions. Grey matter loss can occur due to various factors, such as aging, stroke, brain injury, neurodegenerative diseases such as Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s, and psychological disorders, including trauma. Grey matter loss can impair cognitive functions, such as memory, attention, problem-solving, and learning. It can also affect emotional regulation, motivation, and movement.

Indecision is a source of mental noise that prevents us from having peace of mind. When we are unable to make a choice or take action on an issue, we keep replaying the same scenarios and doubts in our heads, without reaching a resolution. Indecision also creates confusion, as we lose sight of our goals and values, and question our own abilities and judgments. Indecision undermines our confidence and makes us feel insecure and anxious. In large our inability to make a decision is also because our emotions and experiences can overtake our rational mind hindering the ability to problem solve.

Indecision can be a vicious cycle that can damage your brain and your mindset.

However, you can break this cycle by using some strategies to overcome indecision and make better decisions. You can also practice mindfulness and meditation to reduce stress and anxiety, and to focus on the present. By making more confident and consistent decisions, you can also create positive neural pathways in your brain, which can enhance your mental health, your self-esteem, and your confidence.

The negative impact of indecision on relationships.

People who are indecisive have difficulty communicating their needs and preferences or compromising with others. Indecision can have a negative impact on one’s personal and professional life. There are many possible causes of indecision, such as fear of failure, fear of the unknown, fear of being responsible, lack of confidence, lack of information, or people-pleasing tendencies. Some of these causes may be rooted in one’s childhood experiences, personality traits, or cognitive biases. Indecision can also be influenced by external factors, such as too many options, conflicting information, or social pressure.

“The art of decision making includes the art of questioning.”

What are some of the factors that impede decision making?

• Fear of failure. Some people avoid making decisions because they are afraid of making a mistake or missing out on a better option.
• Lack of information or clarity. Some people struggle with making decisions because they do not know who they are. They haven’t done the work to identify their values, beliefs and goals or they may have some conflicting viewpoints.
• Overthinking and/or perfectionism. Some people overcomplicate the decision-making process by considering too many options, details, or outcomes. They may spend too much time and energy on researching, analyzing, or comparing options, hindering any progress or reaching a conclusion. Unrealistic expectations and high standards are also the culprit.
• Procrastination. Maybe you have been hurt by other people’s decisions and it naturally takes longer to process this as you consider who else it might hurt. You tend to factor in every possible scenario. Or perhaps you don’t trust yourself because you have made some bad decisions in the past and you don’t want to make any more mistakes. It’s the default wiring to protect yourself until you are sure.

Some other factors that contribute to indecision include…

Where there has been abuse, sexual abuse or boundaries crossed it can be difficult to overcome emotions in order to make a decision much less the right decision. It affects our decision-making process causing the brain to want to forget and play it safe. The brain has regions and circuits that are involved in regulating and moderating our responses to threats, such as the prefrontal cortex, the hippocampus, and the ventromedial striatum. These regions are responsible for higher cognitive functions, such as planning, reasoning, memory, and decision-making. They help us to evaluate the potential risks and benefits of different options, and to choose the best course of action. They also help us to inhibit or control our impulses, emotions, and behaviors, and to learn from our experiences Emotions can overtake one’s ability to make a rational decision and then the emotions inevitably make the decision for us without reason or rationale or debate or advice. When values and beliefs have not been defined, the decision-making process takes much longer until you have come into agreement with yourself.

It is an important life skill to make decisions, settle values, beliefs and boundaries in your heart, and compartmentalize the thoughts in your mind.

How to ‘Clear the Clutter.’

Sometimes it can help us to weigh our options carefully and avoid impulsive or risky choices. However, when indecision becomes chronic or excessive, it can have negative consequences for our mental health and well-being. Therefore, it is important to learn how to cope with indecision effectively and make decisions that are aligned with our values, purpose and goals.

As a coach who specializes in helping people find direction in their life and achieve their dreams, please email me with any questions you may have. If you want more information or find yourself struggling with indecision and would like some support, please reach out to enquiries@dreamagaincoaching.com